The Know-It-All Mindset (Besserwisser)


Here is a post that exposes the mindset of a know-it-all or besserwisser. I'm sure you know someone who acts superior and thinks he knows everything that's worth knowing.

Discover what's going on in the head of a know-it-all. You will also learn ways to deal with such individuals.

No one in their right frame of mind, would ever say it's pleasant to be around anyone who thinks he's the center of the universe and believes he knows everything. It's not hard to figure out that it takes a huge ego to develop such qualities. As you already know, big egos make for selfishness.

Know-It-All Characteristics


Aside from having big egos and acting superior, besserwissers want to know best and be best at everything they do. Not unlike a child, their egos crave attention and recognition. They also talk a lot about their experiences and achievements, in an attempt to gain respect.

It's a fact, that someone with genuine knowledge and experience, rarely act like a baby in a sandbox. That make know-it-alls wannabes. Moreover, it's deeply-rooted insecurities that call forth the self-centered behavior, which in turn strengthens the ego.

Another shortcoming is the inability to recognize others' solutions and ways as good & valid, since know-it-alls believe their approach is the ultimate one. They also struggle to let go of feelings and thoughts. All in all, it's hard for besserwissers to function in teams.

In my experience, know-it-alls are often intellectual, which makes it easier to argue for their case. Backed by their intellectual abilities and strong personalities, they outsmart and manipulate the competition over and over again.

When you crave to be better than everyone else, it's natural to envy those who shine or do well. As a result, know-it-alls find it difficult to rejoice in others' happiness and success.

Here are two examples that reveal the true know-it-all mindset:

- I was staying in a guest house in Malaysia, where I knew a regular who was an achieved besserwisser. It had rained heavily overnight, so when I saw him in the morning, I said, "It rained a lot last night." He replied, "No, that was nothing."

Besserwissers always want to be right and have the last word, which usually results in meaningless comments. Their need to know best, often place them in a negative light.

- As a teenager I spent four summers flying gliders. A couple of years later, a friend of mine who didn't know I was a glider pilot wanted to tell me everything about gliders, even how to fly them. Yet, he had never set foot in one. His outburst of pseudo knowledge made him look ridiculous.

Besserwissers have tendencies to exaggerate and even lie, just to appear to be the one who knows best.

Forced lectures is another common trait among besserwissers. Out of the blue, you get a lecture on a topic that's totally unrelated to the conversation. The sole purpose of the lengthy monologue, is to show off knowledge. The information may not even be remotely accurate. What is more, you haven't asked for it, but the desire to put himself on a pedestal is so strong, the know-it-all can't resist the temptation.

Top besserwissers even claim they know more about you and understand you better, than you do. That is nothing but a warped perception of reality they use to dominate you.

If you recognize yourself in any of the above descriptions, take a step back and do a reality check. No one has the answer to every question, it's okay not to know.




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Dealing With Besserwissers


It's unpleasant to listen to irrelevant lectures, exaggerations and downright lies. As expected, the ego act of the know-it-all kills the easy and joy of socializing.

I suggest the following strategies:

Don't feed the lectures, exaggerations and lies. In other words, do not encourage know-it-all behavior. It's wise to be cautious and not believe everything you are told. Rather, be critical and verify the information with others or online. Besserwissers frequently exaggerate and lie.

I wouldn't engage in arguments to challenge their facts and statements. That would be a waste of time and only result in an unfriendly exchange. Since besserwissers believe they have a lot to lose, they are willing to fight for hours to prove you wrong. It's better to recognize that you're dealing with a know-it-all, than to engage in an ego battle.

Finally, don't socialize with fools. Spend time with sensible people that give more than they take.

Best of luck!





Related:   Being Sympathetic   Learning To Say No   Building Self-Confidence



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