Dealing With Disappointment

What is disappointment? What triggers it? How do you deal with it?

In this article we'll take a look at what disappointment is, what causes it and some effective strategies to overcome it. You will also get a few pointers on how to prevent disappointment altogether.

But first, what is disappointment?

When your expectations are not met, the mind reacts with negative feelings and thoughts.

Let's say you apply for a new job. You send in your application and go to two interviews. You really hope you will land the position. In other words, you have high expectations. When the bad news reaches you, it's like being weighed down by a stuffy wet blanket.

Disappointment is an unpleasant mental state that is characterized by negative feelings and thoughts and a loss of motivation and hope. It's also quite common to pity oneself.

Scenarios that often trigger disappointment:

- Failing in business

- Not being promoted at work

- Not being accepted into university

- Being ignored by your friends

Overcoming Disappointment

Whenever negative feelings and thoughts enter the mind, there is a high risk you will cling or hold on to them. This is human nature, and makes it more difficult to overcome any negative mental state.

So, the ultimate approach is to wholeheartedly accept every moment as it is. That includes accepting every failure and disappointment as an inevitable part of life. Holding on to your negative feelings and thoughts is a form of resistance, which only make things worse.

Certain personalities find it very difficult to accept and let go of negative mental states, I used to be one of them. Today, I'm most willing to let go of my negative feelings and thoughts, are you?

There are three main reasons for this. One, I'm mindful most of the time. Two, I have practiced letting go for many years. Three, I know that resisting only leads to negative mental states such as irritation, frustration and anger, which in turn results in unease and unhappiness.

By learning to accept every moment as it is, you start to flow with life as opposed to fight it. This way, you will quickly make peace with negative mental states.

It is our nature to suppress unpleasant feelings and thoughts. Instead, embrace your negative emotions with loving, caring attention. That is most healing.

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Getting Back On Your Feet

Regardless whether you have lost your job or been ignored by your friends, don't give up! It is perfectly normal to fail and make mistakes in life. Now it's important that you get back on your feet. So, look for a new job, try to reconnect with your friends and be open for new friendships.

You cannot have ongoing success without ever failing. There is still hope for you, just try again.

Cultivate a willingness to work and make effort. Laziness won't get you anywhere.

It's helpful to have a positive outlook on life.

Be passionate about what you do. That means to do things you are passionate about.

Preventing Disappointment

By lowering your expectations, you will not be as disappointed when things go wrong. However, that is not to say that you shouldn't be dedicated and do your best. Focus on your input and don't worry how it will be received by others. Take a moment to reflect on the difference...

Do not cling to your feelings and thoughts, which only makes for unhappiness. With practice, it is easier to accept and let go of your negative feelings and thoughts. Consciously be willing to flow with life.

Finally, by learning from your failures, you can avoid making the same mistake over again.

Best of luck!

Related:   Understanding Expectations   Letting Go   Frustration

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